When it comes to seriously dating a nearly divorced man, there is frequently a third person in your relationship – his not-quite-ex-wife.
It feels like he’s the one for you but the strong emotions he feels for his wife are a challenge. She was a bitch, yet he seems to be grieving the loss of HER.
Now, one might wonder whether you should even bother dating a man going through a divorce (or a woman, for that matter).
Isn’t it going to be a risky and super-messy affair?
Fast forward a few years, and in at least 50% of those marriages, one or both partners are going to bail on that commitment.
Even those people who are completely clear and convinced they’re doing the right thing in ending the marriage can hit a very painful phase, particularly as the reality of the divorce hits them.
It takes having a strong sense of yourself and your worth, having a very effective support system in place, and a sense of humor really helps a lot.
And being able to be empathetic and compassionate toward both of you is key. It basically describes what we’re all striving to be in our lives, and that’s WITHOUT the added trigger of your man being a nut as he goes through his divorce, and the anxiety you feel about whether or not this will all work out in your favor!
Why Some Relationships Fail Before getting into the meat of what to do, I’d like to take a little bit of time to share with you statistics about relationships.“That’s cool,” I said, as if what he’d said was no big deal. When I questioned her way of going about it, she said to me, “you seem to be just fine, like you’re moving on, but it seems like she needs a friend.” Filled with rage and wanting to cry, I said, “Oh, OK, I get it now. Being the least gossipy of the gossipers, I had been irked recently when one of the members accused me, in a subtle and perhaps unaware way, of causing her problems for having gossiped.Enraged from my conversation with R., I sent an email to P., one of the members of my group, copying A. In it, I accused her of being as gossipy as other gossipers.As I posted earlier this month, I’m going through a divorce.One of the interesting corollaries to my divorce is that, in general, it’s brought me closer to male acquaintances, friends, and siblings, while further from their female counterparts.It’s not going to be easy, but it’s necessary for you to completely heal and move on.